Son of the Doctor
by EMill1282
Summary: After a long life, Doctor Who has finally passed on and has left his mind, memories and TARDIS to his son along with the title of the Doctor. Now the New Doctor is off to meet the universe head on, just as his predecessor did, with the help of his trusty TARDIS and faithful companions. Rated M for possible future content.
1. Chapter 1

Son of the Doctor, A Doctor Who AU story

Chapter 1: Renewal

_76 Totter's Lane, London, England, 1953_

A strange grinding wheezing groaning sound cut through the London fog like a knife, startling a teen aged boy from his work in the garage, fearing he may have unintentionally damaged something. He looked around the old motor car searching for anything which might have caused the sounds, when they stopped with an abrupt thump. The boy grabbed a spanner and stepped out into the scrap yard of 76 Totter's Lane, he stopped suddenly as he noticed a strange Police Box standing in the yard, where he knew one hadn't been even an hour before. He tightened his grip on the spanner, not certain of what was happening, but drawing some comfort in the fact that he was at least marginally armed.

A moment later two figures stumbled out of the Police Box, masses of smoke pouring out from the open door behind them. One figure, an ancient looking old man dressed in a long coat that would have been fashionable in the Court of George III, stumbled, and fell taking a much younger looking boy in very strange orange robes down with him. The teenager with the spanner crept forward, keeping to the foggy shadows as he watched, he couldn't quite figure out why the pair was together, perhaps the young boy was the old man's grandson, but still the whole thing was terribly odd.

The old man grasped the young boy's head pulling him close with a skeletal hand and whispered something in the boy's ear. A moment later the old man was engulfed in a blinding golden light, until all that remained were the old man's clothes empty and useless on the ground. The light seemed to hover for a moment before it began to ensnare the young boy, as though the golden energy were strands of rope. The teenager was entranced and rooted to the spot, not certain what to do, part of him screamed to go help the boy, not that he had any real clue how, another louder part told him to run back into the garage and forget everything he had seen. Yet he remained, refusing to move as the golden light enveloped the boy completely, until it looked as though the light were actually coming from the boy himself. The boy cried out in pain as the light consumed him, having decided he could stand and watch no longer the teenager tried to rush forward to help, only to see the boy's body and face distort and change, causing the young boy to grow older morphing back and forth between the boy's features and the old man's. Moments later the light faded and in place of the young boy a teenager, probably no more than sixteen lie on the ground wearing the strange orange robes, his chest heaving with the exertion, and an oddly serene and content look on his face.

The teenager with the spanner carefully approached the boy, kneeling down next to him as he crooned out,

"It's ok, you're going to be ok. Jett's got you now…"

"I need...I need..." the other boy muttered his eyelids fluttering.

"What do you need?" Jett asked concern etched across his young face.

"A banana, A banana would be good, no wait. I hate bananas. Maybe some good old fashion sausage..., no hold that thought. Sausages are terrible. Terrible, terrible sausages. Some water, you can't go wrong with water, no tea, tea would be great—NO! WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! I KNOW WHAT I NEED! I need...I need...I need...a nap. Yes! Napping is good. I need a nap! Would you mind awfully if I took a nap. Regenerating like that is quite exhausting, so really a nap would definitely be in order. Just what the doctor ordered you might say. Hmm... doctor...doctor...did you call for a doctor? Are you ill? Injured? Constipated? NO! Of course you didn't call for a doctor...I DID. Now why would I call for a doctor? I've only just regenerated, why would I need a doctor?...NO WAIT! I KNOW WHAT IT IS! I didn't CALL for a doctor. I AM THE DOCTOR! YES THAT'S IT! I AM THE DOCTOR!" The boy calling himself the Doctor opened his eyes a grin splitting his handsome features as he spoke to Jett again, "Hello. I am the Doctor. Terribly good to make your acquaintance. Would you be so kind as to help me up, it seems the motor functions are still a bit wibbley." Jett helped the boy to his feet guiding him inside the garage.

"Yes, yes, very good. Mmm much better. Thank you...WHAT AM I WEARING?!" the Doctor exclaimed pulling at his strange orange robes for a better inspection.

"Oh no no no no no NO these will not DO! No not at all," He began pulling the robes over his head and casually tossing them aside.

"WAIT! What IS that sound?" he whirled around getting up close to Jett looking him over with intense interest. "It's YOU?!" The Doctor put his ear against Jett's chest listening intently.

"A single heart! How extraordinarily alien and utterly revolting! I never could understand how you people could walk around like that, it's like you're only half put together...oh my, it seems to be speeding up." He taped a finger on Jett's chest thumping it like a ripe melon.

"Er...um...excuse me..." Jett muttered trying to extricate himself from the naked Doctor's odd embrace.

"Oh listen to it go. My that cannot be a good thing to prolong...perhaps you need some...oh what was that called...oh I know! It's called mouth to mouth! You must need mouth to mouth!" The Doctor knocked Jett onto a shabby sofa, his lips firmly attached to Jett's letting loose a stream of air into his protesting mouth.

"OI! That's enough of that!" Jett pushed the Doctor off of him, getting up to stand and eyeing the strange naked boy warily.

"Oh dear have I done something wrong? You know sometimes things don't settle in right away after a regeneration. If you could wait a bit I'm certain we could try again and see about getting that heart rate back down out of the rafters. RAFTERS! HA I remember what those are, isn't the WONDERFUL?!"

"Who ARE you?" Jett asked incredulously.

"Didn't you hear me?" The Doctor gets up close to Jett's ear and yelled. "I AM THE DOCTOR!"

"ALRIGHT! No need to sound like a madman."

"Oh but I AM a madman. The maddest madman, who ever was in a box! In a box? In a box. IN A BOX! Where is my box?! It's big, it's blue and it's boxy," The Doctor put his hands on either of Jett's shoulders staring at him wild eyed.

"Easy there. It's out in the scrap yard. It's not going anywhere,"

"Oh good. We must get back to it rather soon you know? The old girl is rather jealous and protective of me. I say is there something wrong with your trousers? There seems to be something growing there. Here, let's get them off and let me have a look, it might be something dangerous, you know," The Doctor reached for Jett's waistband and tugged.

"It's nothing dangerous," Jett said through gritted teeth as he pushed the Doctor's hands away from his groin. "It does that from time to time. It's nothing to worry about."

"Oh! How fascinating. I wonder could it be something contagious? Perhaps I had better take a look at it after all. You know, as a Time Lord my immune system is rather good, and could perhaps generate a cure for that problem-"

"It's NOT A PROBLEM! Look. It is perfectly natural. Look, even yours is doing same thing-" Jett regretted saying it as soon as the words left his mouth. The Doctor looked down at his own naked and growing manhood in fascination, touching and poking at it in wonder.

"Well that's different. I don't recall it having done that, well not recently...OHHHHH! It's AROUSAL! It hasn't done that in quite some time, how fascinating."

"Yes...well, maybe we should find you some clothes...I'd lend you some of mind, but I don't think they'll fit you..."

"Oh never mind that. There are plenty of clothes in the TARDIS wardrobe. Never fear," The Doctor said absently as pulled down on his member letting it go to slap against his firm stomach. He looked up at Jett with a grin.

"I think I might enjoy this...ooooooooo I say what is THAT?" The Doctor bounded over the sofa and began affectionately stroking the canary yellow antique motorcar.

"It's-"

"Bessie." The Doctor supplied. "I had one just like her, a long time ago when I was much older. I dare say, are those leather seats original? Oh my, that is lovely so very lovely," The Doctor carried on examining the car and muttering to himself until Jett stepped up, cleared his throat to get the Doctor's attention.

"AHEM. Doctor. That car isn't mine. And I'm certain the owner would have objections to a strange naked man crawling around all over his freshly detailed vehicle."

"Oh yes of course. How thought less of me. RIGHT. To the TARDIS!"

"What is a tardis?"

"It's my transport. Time and Relative Dimension in Space. The blue box. Do keep up my boy. I hate having to repeat myself, it's so very distracting." The Doctor walked boldly out into the yard, to the battered and still slightly smoking Police Telephone Box. The Doctor patted himself all over his body, with a growing look of concern on his young features.

"Doctor?" Jett asked looking confused.

"It has to be here somewhere, I know I had it...oh where could it have gone?" The Doctor muttered, completely forgetting that Jett was there. "I had to have had it before we arrived, there's not another way, I mean I would have had to have it in order to get it in wouldn't I?"

"Had what? Doctor what are you talking about?"

"The KEY!" The Doctor exclaimed irritated at being distracted. "I need the key to get into my TARDIS, weren't you paying attention? Hmmph _HUMANS_" The way he said "humans" was made to sound like it was the worst possible insult in the universe. "Single hearts, and brains which are barely even used, sometimes I don't even know why I bother. "

Jett tried to ignore the Doctor's odd comments and offered a suggestion. "Maybe the key is in those robes you left in the garage..."

The Doctor's eyes lit up like a Christmas tree. "OF COURSE! Oh you are a brilliant boy aren't you?" he grabbed hold of either side of Jett's face and kissed him roughly, beaming with pride, before he abruptly turned around running back inside the garage leaving Jett standing in the yard dazed and at a loss for words. He shook himself as he heard the Doctor ranting, a loud clang followed by some colourful curses while he searched the shapeless mass of fabric which had once been his robes. Jett looked down noticing for the first time that he was standing nearly on top of the spot where he had first seen the old man with the young boy. He stooped down and picked up the navy blue jacket and carefully felt inside the pocket.

Jett was astonished how impossibly deep they were, he pulled out all sorts of things, a cricket ball, a yo-yo, a wax paper bag full of...jelly babies? Jett shook his head again and delved deeper into the impossible pocket.

"And just what are you doing?" The Doctor asked, his voice dark and menacing as he glared at Jett. Jett looked up at him surprised at the glower on the boy's face, noting the scraps of orange fabric sticking to his sweaty body, his hair tousled so much that it looked as though he had just gotten out of bed, a golf ball sized lump forming on his forehead right below the hairline. But it was the terrible look in those eyes, which made Jett's blood run cold.

"Helping," Jett's voice squeaked a little, he cleared his throat and tried again. "I saw these laying here, and I thought I would help look for the key, you know the more people looking the more likely to find it," The Doctor glared at him a moment longer before kneeling down next to him, the tension and anger draining from the Doctor's face.

"What have you found?" He asked in a gentle voice, the terrible storm now gone from his eyes.

"Just these bits and bobs so far; I can't believe these pockets could hold that much stuff, yet there it all is..."

"Well of course they can, those pocket are bigger on the inside. Hand it here," Jett frowned and handed the Doctor the jacket. He slipped on the long coat and began digging around in the pockets with each hand, pulling out bits of string, spoons, a rubber chicken and then finally with a shout of triumph he pulled out a strange looking key on a chain that looked as though it should be worn around the neck.

"Excellent! Thank you...what was your name again?" The Doctor frown at Jett as though trying hard to remember.

"Jett. My friends call me Jett."

"Then we shall be friends and I shall call you Jett." The Doctor grinned, slipping the key around his neck and replacing all of the various items the pair had removed from his pockets.

"So Jett, my friend, do you want to come along?" The Doctor asked twirling his key around a forefinger.

"Come along where?" Jett asked looked perplexed.

"On an adventure of course! Anywhere in all of space and time, we can go there, that's what my blue box does, it is a time machine."

"A time machine?" Jett asked skeptical and unimpressed.

"Oh come now Jett, after the strange things you've seen today, surely the idea that a Police Box can be a time machine shouldn't be that difficult of a concept. Come on, let's you and me go see what the universe has to offer. We can go to anywhere and any when, all you have to do is say yes," The Doctor grinned offering Jett a hand.

"You really mean it don't you?" Jett asked as he heaved himself to his feet with the Doctor's help.

"Of course I do. So what do you say Jett? Want to go on an adventure?"

"Let's see this TARDIS of yours first, then I can give you an answer,"

The Doctor smiled slyly as he unlocked the Police Box door, gently pushing it open and stepping inside to reveal something beyond Jett's wildest imagination, a room, which truly was bigger on the inside. The walls were an off white set with large circles or roundels giving off the impression of something akin to Swiss cheese. There were ancient looking columns and pillars, which looked as though they belonged in a Greek or Roman temple. Large bookcases flanked another set of doors opposite the ones they had just entered, with plush Victorian wing back chairs, and Roman style sofas set alongside the book cases. In the center of the room was a massive hexagonal pedestal with countless buttons, switches, levers, dials and other controls and displays Jett didn't have the words for. In the center of the hexagon was a long tall blue crystal cylinder which seemed to grow from the controls all the way to the ceiling. The lighting was soft and cool, filling Jett with a strange sort of calm, and all around him was a persistent background hum, nothing pervasive or annoying, just comforting.

"Not only is it bigger on the inside," Jett marveled, "It's alive."

"Jett, meet the TARDIS. I think she likes you, go on tell her hello," The Doctor prodded as he stood close to Jett.

"Hello TARDIS," Jett whispered not quite sure what to make of everything. A soft "Ding" seemed to answer in response. The Doctor laughed lightly as Jett stared at him wide eyed.

"I told you she likes you. Now what do you say? Want to come along?"

"Maybe you had better put some clothes on first..." Jett answered with a slight blush colouring his cheeks. The Doctor looked down with slight surprise to find he was in fact still naked, with only the old man's jacket to cover his exposed flesh.

"You might have a point there, although on some worlds it is considered bad form to wear clothing at all. Only foreigners and those with something to hide wear clothes. I can't remember which worlds they are exactly, but I'm willing to keep traveling until we find them," the Doctor whispered almost conspiratorially with a mischievous glint in his eyes as he threw an arm around Jett's shoulder.

"Let's come back to that thought," Jett replied turning a deeper shade of red. "Why don't we try something a little less, er...revealing, like I dunno, maybe the moon or Mars, we can meet the little green men there or something."

"Hate to break it to you, but I've been to Mars, and the little green men aren't exactly little, nor welcoming of strangers, but I get your point, we can always visit the Eternal Water falls of Kalgygia in the 75th century later. I have heard that if one tries to slide down the water fall, the water feels like it is caressing you with a million kisses to your skin, or a giant tongue lightly licking you all over. It's quite the experience I'm told..."

"Doctor," Jett said as he shifted awkwardly, with strange thoughts of traveling in a 1907 Daimler Type 45 motorcar, driving along a beach, looking down on a glittering purple waterfall…jumping from the motorcar into the waterfall...both of them naked...flowed unbidden into his mind "Ahem. Right." Jett said ducking out from under the Doctor's arm, bringing an abrupt stop to the images flowing into his head. "Clothes. You need clothes. So where is this wardrobe of yours Doctor?"

It was a moment before the Doctor evidently lost in thought responded muttering, "Oh you sexy thing…look at you…I wouldn't mind poking around under your bonnet..." Jett elbowed him lightly in the ribs saying more firmly,

"Doctor. The wardrobe. Where is it?"

"Hmmm? What? Oh the wardrobe! This way." The Doctor started through the doors opposite the ones they had used to enter the TARDIS. He strode forward with a sense of purpose and determination, his features still holding a slightly distracted look as he led the way.

Jett was still fairly dumbstruck by the apparent impossibility that was the TARDIS, it was like a world unto itself. The corridor was much like the control room with the off white colouring and the Swiss cheese motif, which was impossibly large and long, it felt like a lifetime before the Doctor stopped at a door, threw it open and marched inside, shrugging out of the old jacket and tossing it away without a second thought, sliding in behind a dressing screen.

"So this is your wardrobe?" Jett asked betting that he could have fit the whole garage inside just this one room.

"Well technically it was my other self's, but I suppose I've inherited it now."

"Your other self? You mean that old man you were with when you first arrived?"

"That's the one. You see, I'm not technically the Doctor, well not the original Time Lord known as the Doctor. I am a progenated Time Lord metacrisis. I was born from a tissue sample from the original Doctor, which was genetically broken down and rearranged in such a way that the Doctor was both my father and mother, I'm not the only one to have been born that way. I had sister, or I suppose technically my daughter now...let's not think about that bit. At any rate she was born in the same way, or I should say the Mark 1 version. I had the good fortune of the Doctor tweeking the machine a bit, to make me a true Time Lord. During my incubation cycle, I was educated and trained as though I had been born on Gallifrey, the Doctor's home world. In essence I learned and experienced everything the Doctor did up until about the age of eight, which was roughly the age I was when we landed here." The Doctor stepped out from behind the screen wearing a navy blue tee shirt, with combat style boots and black denim jeans. He looked at himself in a full length mirror frowning a bit as he turned this way and that.

"Not quite," he muttered before he disappeared back into the racks of clothes.

"So what happened? Why did you land here and now?" Jett asked genuinely curious.

"We ran into a bit of bump in the vortex, not really sure what it was, but it was enough to do the old man in. Luckily for him, and me I suppose, he had set a safety protocol linking the TARDIS with my incubation unit, so that she would wake me in case of an emergency, such as the Doctor nearing the end of his life prematurely. So I was released from the incubation unit and together, the old man and I just managed to land the TARDIS, unfortunately there was a lot of poisonous smoke filling the control room, we had to leave the TARDIS and let her vent it out through her detox scrubbers, and well you saw what happened,"

Jett watched as the Doctor popped out every now and again wearing various items, discarding them as quickly as he had put them on and disappearing back into the racks again.

"I did, but what happened? I just saw this golden energy go into you, and then you changed into, well you,"

"Ah yes, that was the metacrisis bit. All of the old man's psychic energy, memories, and I dare say his very essence transferred into me. So everything the Doctor knew, everything the Doctor was, is now in me. Although, like a regeneration, it's all a bit scrambled now, so I have my own personality, quirks and what have you. In the end I guess I am now the new Doctor, the one and only really."

"What is this regeneration thing you keep talking about?"

"Oh that? Time Lords have this ability to undergo a complete cellular regeneration, meaning everything gets scrambled up and rearranged into someone new. It turns them into a whole new person. It's just one of our tricks to stave off death, although we can die and die permanently, it's just much harder to do." The Doctor stepped out wearing a blue flannel shirt over his tee shirt, left unbuttoned, a cream coloured hooded sweat shirt over top of that, left unzipped and a long black leather jacket which reached the top of his thighs.

"What do you think?" he asked twirling around in front of the mirror.

Jett grinned despite himself. "You look rather odd…but it suits you," The Doctor gave him a devilish grin before slinging an arm around Jett's shoulders, guiding him back into the corridor.

"So have you decided yet?"

"Decided?" Jett asked, feeling a bit awkward and flustered by their close proximity.

"Are we going to go on an adventure together?"

"Uh…yeah, why not. I mean if this really is a time machine we can always come back like I had never been gone at all," Jett answered feeling strangely exhilarated.

"Excellent!" the Doctor exclaimed throwing open a door, seemingly at random, revealing the control room.

"Wait? Wasn't that further away?" Jett asked completely confused.

"It was, and now it's not. The TARDIS is funny like that." He ran around the console throwing switches, turning dials, pushing buttons, in a pattern which could only have made sense to him. He stopped, coming up behind Jett, slipping his arms over Jett's and resting his chin on Jett's shoulder. "Are you ready to see what the universe has to offer?" the Doctor whispered in Jett's ear as he guiding Jett's right hand to a large lever on the console. Jett shivered and nodded mutely.

The Doctor grinned saying. "Then. Here. We. Go!" Together they pulled back the lever, the TARDIS dematerialized into the vortex towards adventure.

**Author's Note:**

This is my first attempt at an AU fan fic, just a bit of fun and an attempt to continue the trend of a sexier Doctor, without changing the character of the original Doctor. In the future there may be some m/m action going on either seen or implied.

I hate it when author's beg for reviews, but I find that with this story being a bit of an experiment for me, I'm going to need your feedback, just to know if I should carry on with the story or not. Please no flames, just honest feedback, thank you.

This story and others can also be found on the coasa-archive, there's a link in my profile.

Hope you enjoy this and the others to come,

~EMill1282


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: The Fire Makers

Jett stood outside the wardrobe room looking disgruntled as the Doctor continued to search for something within the room's depths.

"Are you sure you have the coordinates right this time Doctor?" Jett asked annoyed. During their last trip they had planned to visit the Castrovani system to view all of the latest 51st century starships, instead they had found themselves on a deserted desert planet, with absolutely no civilization to be found what so ever.

"Oh come now, you love the fact that you are one of only two people who have ever seen the fire rains of Belayne,"

"There's probably a good reason for that, given that the whole surface of the planet melted into glass,"

"Well yeah but once you saw the sunlight reflecting off the glass, you could see into whole knew colour spectrum..."

"Oh sure that was great, until it nearly blinded me,"

"Well it was only nearly-"

"And then the second round of fire rains came and we ran out of breathable air,"

"Yeah...that was a bit unexpected...but one might say that the spectacle was literally breath taking," the Doctor grinned at Jett as he poked his head out from behind one of the racks of clothes. Jett gave an unamused snort as he crossed his arms over his chest frowning.

"So where are we supposed to be going this time?" Jett asked almost afraid to hear the answer.

"Oh come on Mr. Grumpy-face, cheer up. We're not going too terribly far this time. I'm actually quite good at these short hops you know." the Doctor flung a large woolly hat over his shoulder, catching Jett almost square in the face. He grunted and put the hat away waiting. He had been traveling with the Doctor for some time now, while most trips had been quite fun and exciting, others had been dangerous and fairly terrifying, but it never quite seemed to effect the Doctor, he took the danger in stride and like a cat he always managed to somehow land on his feet. "To answer your question, we are going to the Paris–Rouen, Le Petit Journal Competition for Horseless Carriages in 1894. It's actually quite an exciting event you know? It's one of the first times that humans use motor cars in a competition or race of any kind. Mind you the speeds weren't much to write home about, at least by your modern standards, but at the time it was the thrill of a life time. Barreling down the open road at a whole 20 miles per hour...you know many people at the time thought that going that fast had ill health effects...which I suppose would be correct if you take into account the crashes, roll overs, and what have you..." Jett rolled his eyes as the Doctor trailed off.

"Again I have to ask Doctor, did you get the coordinates right this time? I don't want to step out the doors and find myself floating in space, or sinking in an ocean or something equally unpleasant,"

"Oh ye of little faith," the Doctor said emerging from the mass of clothes, looking for all the world like some old World War I pilot, a long brown double breasted leather trench coat, knee high riding style boots, a long white silk scarf wrapped around his neck, a tweed flat cap worn backwards on his head, and a pair of ridiculously large goggles perched at the top of his forehead.

"Please don't tell me that's what you'll be wearing," Jett said with a critical eye.

"Of course I am. It's always best to blend in as best you can, you know that," the Doctor answered airily as he stuck a pair of thick leather gauntleted gloves in the belted wait of his coat.

"Oh you'll blend right in with that outfit, you don't look like some kind of alien trying to blend in at all," the sarcasm coming fast and thick, and the Doctor was completely oblivious.

"I am the master of disguise and blending in, although there was that one time in the Amazon when a tribe there seemed to think I was their god the Mighty ZiDoktora,"

"How very Wizard of Oz," Jett commented smirking a little.

"Where do you think L. Frank Baum got the idea? Although the whole needing a brain, heart and courage bit was taken out of context. I told them that I was extremely brilliant, and that if they listened to me, they would be saved from the upcoming flood…I think something got lost in the translation, and they thought that I told them to get my courage, all they had to do was cut out my heart and bash in my brains. An honest mistake, it could have happened to anyone…" the Doctor strode down the ever changing corridor with Jett in tow. "Right, are we ready for our next adventure?" he asked once they reached the control room.

"Only if you managed to get the coordinates right this time. I really don't fancy another life or death struggle as soon as we walk out the doors. You were trained to fly this thing? Right?" Jett asked a little petulantly.

"Of course I was trained. I have been flying this TARDIS throughout the known universe, all of time and then some. You know traveling through time and space isn't as simple as you humans seem to think. It's not like you get in a rail car visiting various points in history, although I did that once, the motion sickness was dreadful,"

"Doctor," the Doctor kept walking and talking as he threw the door control switch.

"Time is more like a big ball of interconnecting roots, except they keep expanding and contracting, as an infinite number of possible time lines are created and destroyed at any possible moment."

"Doctor," Jett growled

"And then you throw in the spatial element into it as well, it's like trying to bull's eye a microscopic dart board from miles away while traveling in a balloon in a hurricane, that is to say it isn't impossible, just exceedingly difficult,"

"Doctor!" Jett grabbed his arm stopping the other boy as he looked purposefully at the ring of savage looking people around them.

"Ah," the Doctor said noting their flint pointed spears and ragged furs. "So not Paris 1894...must have been a misplaced decimal point somewhere..."

"Doctor you did it again," Jett said utterly exasperated.

"I did no such thing!" The Doctor barked indignantly. "It's you lot-" one of the men grunted and gestured a spear at them. "Not now! My friend and I are having a very serious discussion here. You will just have to wait,"

"Doctor? You speak caveman?" Jett asked quirking an eyebrow.

"Of course I speak caveman. I also speak baby, High Ganymedeian, Flymeailian sign language, which isn't easy with only two hands and ten fingers I'll tell you; Terseran, please do not ask me to demonstrate that one, it can get rather messy especially if someone happens to light a match...what else? Oh yes I also speak horse. I once knew a horse named Susan, a splendid chap if I ever saw one. I also knew a horse named Arthur, although he turned out to by a Zygon. You know those big red rubbery things with lots of suckers, venom sacks in their mouths...surprisingly good kissers..." the Doctor looked off into space for a moment as though lost in thought, turning abruptly on Jett. "But that's beside the point! The point is you lot have so many different calendars, for one little world in all of the cosmos. There's a lunar calendar, a solar calendar, a Julian calendar...all because two men decided they were important enough to have their own months, then came the Gregorian calendar, not to mention the whole BC, AD, CE, BCE and all of that codswollop. Seriously, how do you expect a time traveler to know where he is when you don't even know where you are?! Sometimes I don't know why I even bother with your lot..."

"Doctor! As fascinating as that all must be, I'm sure. We have bigger problems right now. You know the 30 or so heavily armed cavemen, all looking rather dangerous and threatening..." Jett hissed trying to keep his temper. As much as he loved traveling and being with the Doctor, there were times when the boy's intelligence, and bloody ego were extremely trying.

"Yes I know that!" the Doctor said testily. "Right. So which one of you lot is in charge here? Take me to your leader," the Doctor grinned, stage whispering to Jett, "I've always wanted to say that,"

Jett just rolled his eyes as a bear of a man stepped forward.

"You gods?" he asked. Jett wondered why the TARDIS wasn't translating the language as well as it normally did. Maybe the language was too simple, which made translating the context more difficult than translating the words.

"Why? Are you looking for gods? We could be gods, you never know. Why you should see Jett here in a Speedo, definitely the body of a god that's for certain..." the Doctor rattled off, getting into the big man's face, Jett blushed a deep red. He really did not need the Doctor talking about him like that, especially not while they could be in danger.

"You make fire. Gods make fire. You gods. Fire make chief. You give fire Tal. Fire make Tal chief." the bear of a man, Tal evidently, nodded as though that were the end of the discussion, which was probably the longest one the man had ever spoken.

"Oh? Will we now? Certainly we can make fire, why Jett here," the Doctor secretly pulled out a lighter from his pocket passing it to Jett without the natives noticing. "He can make fire at the snap of his fingers. Show him Jett," the Doctor said while Jett fumbled with the lighter for a moment, then a small blueish flame came to life. Tal and those closest to the Doctor and Jett scrambled back in terror cowering back from the pair.

"Yes, yes, tremble in fear of the bluey blueness of the fire of the gods ooooooo," the Doctor said a bit mockingly taking an unconscious step closer to Jett. "Now, Tal, me old would-be-chief, what makes you so important that you think you should be the leader? Why should we give you fire?" the Doctor asked crossing his arms over his chest.

"Tal strong. Tal father make fire. Tal father leader. Tal be leader,"

"Ohhhhhh I see, you think that just because your father could make fire, that you should automatically be the leader. Tell me can Tal make his own fire? Hmm? Can strong Tal fend off the cold? Hang on...this seems rather familiar..."

"Doctor, is it wise to provoke them? The have spears and knives, and we have a lighter, not to mention the fact that there are a lot more of them than there are of us," Jett asked holding the lighter higher forcing a number of the bolder souls to take a step back.

"It's perfectly alright. They wouldn't dare to hurt us, because if they do, we take the secret of fire making with us, and I'll bet pennies to parsnips that old Tal over there is too smart to risk losing the secrets of fire." the Doctor explained easily as he studied the faces around him.

"You not give Tal fire? Tal take fire!"

"Ahahah, I don't think so. Jett put out the fire," Jett removed his thumb from the lighter's fuel extinguishing the tiny flame, much to the dismay and fury of the cavemen around him.

"You bring back! You give Tal fire! Or you die!" Tal gestured threateningly with his spear, while Jett readied the lighter and the Doctor sighed.

"You see Jett, in a billion years humanity barely changes. Give me what I want or I'll kill you, it's all very Dalek really. But I have put rather a lot of work into your people, there is hope, there is always hope,"

"Yes Doctor, that's all fine and good, but these people don't really seem to care how much work you've put into them..."

"Take him." Tal commanded two burly men, who rushed towards Jett. Jett tried to relight the lighter, but it was knocked of his hand as he tried to avoid the brutes coming after him. The Doctor tried to divert on their attentions, only to be soundly clocked on the side of the head, sending him to the ground in an unceremonious heap.

"Doctor! Get your hands off of me! Doctor!" Jett struggled to get away, but was held fast. A group of strong men picked up the Doctor and tied him to a long pole, carrying him like some kind of fresh kill.

"Not gods. Tal eat not-gods. Tal take fire from not-gods. Tal make fire. Tal leader always," Tal nodded and the group carried the Doctor on his pole, along with prodding, a newly gagged Jett, to get moving. The longer they marched the more frantic Jett got and the more roughly the cavemen shoved or dragged him. Jett was truly beginning to worry about the Doctor, surely the hit hadn't been so hard as to kill him. Even if it had killed him, wouldn't the Doctor just regenerate and change into a new body, not that much cared for that idea, he rather liked the body the Doctor was currently inhabiting, but having the Doctor die...that was just unbearable. Not to mention that fact that Jett weren't killed as well, he'd be stuck millions of years before he was even supposed to be born. Jett pondered that thought for a moment. It was one of the major risks of time travel, but Jett was certain he wouldn't have given up traveling with the Doctor for all the money in the universe.

After much poking and prodding they arrived at their destination, a small cave with a boulder to roll in front of the entrance, and from the look of it, it would take several of these big burly men to move it, not a promising thought. The men carrying the Doctor dumped him inside the cave like a sack of potatoes, then Jett was tossed in on top of him. Moments later there was the sounds of grunting and stone scraping, then the cave was sealed leaving Jett bound and gagged with the Doctor's motionless form beneath him. Unshed tears stung his eyes as panic and despair seeped into Jett's mind, he was alone in the dark with a possibly dead body beneath him, that was something Jett had never been prepared for. He squeaked in surprise as the Doctor shifted beneath him and the Doctor spoke in a soft voice,

"Well that could have gone better,"

Jett sobbed once, then in a fit of stress and anger managed to curse the Doctor from behind the confines of his gag.

"Dear me. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" the Doctor asked as he wormed his bound hands behind Jett's head and managed to untie the gag. The Doctor's grew to the size of saucers as Jett kissed him hard full on the mouth.

"No, but I managed to kiss you..." Jett spoke softly, all of his fear and anger melting away as they continue to lie there awkwardly. "Never do that to me again." Jett's voice rang with authority as he looked hard into the semi-darkness where he knew the Doctor's eyes would be. "I was sure they had killed you. Never. Do. That. Again." Each word punctuated with a kiss.

"Jett," the Doctor said calmly. "I was knocked out, it happens. If I were to die, to well and truly die, you would know without a doubt. And just between you and me, I think the whole of time and space would shudder the day the Doctor dies..."

Jett nodded resting his head on the Doctor's shoulder, suddenly feeling deflated. "Sorry, I should have known better...but they said they were going to kill you, and eat you..." an involuntary shiver raked Jett's body.

"Not to put too fine a point on it Jett, but I think they still plan on it. They just didn't want to risk it when night fell, so they tossed us in here to I don't know, stew in our own juices, become more compliant, die from fear...which means we have to find a way to escape, and we only have until dawn to do it." the Doctor seemed to wiggle and squirm more vigorously, then with a triumphant yell the Doctor wrapped his arms around Jett hugging him tightly. "Managed to get my hands free, in case you didn't notice. Now, hold still. There, your hands should be free as well,"

As soon as the raw hide strips left his wrists, Jett wrapped his arms around the Doctor and the stayed like that for a long moment.

"Right, back to the business at hand, we need to escape," the Doctor announced as they shifted themselves into sitting positions and began to work on the bonds around their ankles. "I seem to remember having been in a situation like this before..." Jett frowned as he waited for the Doctor to finish his thought.

"And?" he asked impatiently.

"And I can't remember for the life of me how we managed to get away. Which means I need to come up with a new plan, a brilliant plan, a plan like no other...well not necessarily like no other, but definitely a brilliant plan none the less."

"And have you got this brilliant oh so wonderful plan figured out?"

"Not yet, but I will have once I've finished talking. Right, let's take stock of our situation." the Doctor stood up and began to pace the entire area of the cave. "We are in a relatively small cave like structure. There is only one entrance we know of, which is blocked off, presumably by a rather large and heavy boulder. There does seem to be a source of fresh air, so there must be a crack, a fissure or even another opening somewhere, which is an encouraging sign, at least we won't suffocate," the Doctor grinned at Jett. "Hmmm this area back here seems to have lovely acoustics, and there seems to be a fair amount of rubbish back here as well, what's this?" Jett could only guess what the Doctor was doing for a few moments.

"Oh you are a beauty. Oh yes! Oh very yes! I am extremely brilliant!" the Doctor praised himself as he sat next to Jett throwing an arm around the boy's shoulder.

"Of course you are," Jett answered slightly leaning into the Doctor's embrace. "But how's that going to help us not turn into some caveman's breakfast?" Jett could almost feel the smug pride radiating off of the Doctor's Cheshire cat grin as he spoke without moving his lips,

"Because we know something which we know, that they don't," 

Jett frowned not following.

""I am the great and powerful Oz! You see I taught Edger Bergen everything he knew. Oh come now Jett, think about it, what better way to fool these people than to give them exactly what they expect. They want us to be gods, and they want to be terrified of us, so I say let's give 'em a show,"

Realization dawned on Jett with a slow smile as the thoughts began to come together in his head.

"Can we really fool them? I mean they've already seen us and know that we're more or less human, at least in their eyes. Do we have what we need to convince them that we are actually terribly terrifying?"

"Oh certainly! I can be terrifyingly terrible," He shot Jett a wink, "At any rate what doesn't scare them will just have to be improvise until they are. Right. So first thing's first, we need some light. Do you still have that lighter I gave you Jett?"

Jett checked his pockets frowning deeply as the fact of the matter hit home.

"No...I think it was knocked out of my hand when they attacked us...I'm sorry Doctor..."

"Never mind that, I'll just use the sonic...except it's in the workroom back in the TARDIS. You know it has been a bit wonky since that sand worm on Tuchonka swallowed it...Ok right, so, no sonic, no lighter, what else do we have?" the Doctor dug around in his pockets for a few moments, seemingly finding nothing, which made the guilt building in Jett's chest expanded to new levels as he thought about that missing lighter. "AH HA!" the Doctor shouted as he pulled out an enormous box of matches. He shook the box, which rattled only lightly and he frowned with concern. He slid open the box only to find two matches inside, one of which was missing its head. "Ah...well then. Hmmm, I suppose we'll just have to make do. I used to use everlasting matches you know, only ever needed one of those for anything ever, that was until about 1666, when some drunk lout knocked it out of my hand right into a large stack of hay, and well I'm sure you've heard about the Great Fire of London...it wasn't really my fault, ok I suppose it was a bit..."

"Doctor, focus please," Jett said trying to hide a smile.

"Hmmm? What? RIGHT!" the Doctor started pacing again, nearly tripping over a large stalagmite. "OUCH! Oh wait...NO! That's brilliant! The final piece we need!" the Doctor started grabbing up arm loads of branches, disappearing into a dark corner of the cave, then stacking them around the stalagmite like a teepee.

"Doctor is there anything I can do to help? I can't really see anything right now, but I can't just sit here an do nothing,"

"Hmm? Oh um, right why don't you grab a branch or bit of wood, warp our bindings around them and bring then over here to me?"

"Doctor, there's not much in the way of branches or wood in here,"

"Then use the bones, there should be plenty of those...OH I found the other entrance, it's small, I'm not sure even you could squeeze out that way...at least we won't suffocate once we get a fire going, and just maybe we'll get enough smoke going to attract some attention...here give us the torches you made, I think I found something extremely useful that may make our lives that much easier." Jett handed the leather wrapped bones to the Doctor who took them and disappeared into the darkness of the cave.

"Excellent!" there was the strike of a match and then a flare of light as one of the torches blazed to life. "Oh yes that is so very excellent. Right, here you go Jett," he handed one of the torches to the boy after lighting his own. "That should last at least long enough for us to get the job done. Give us a hand over here," the Doctor held up a large skull with a mouth full of razor sharp teeth. Jett helped the Doctor heft the enormous skull over to the stalagmite where they set it down over the mass of rock and branches.

"Now what?"

"Now we prime the illusion." He took his torch and lit the wood around the skull, as the fire took hold the shadows and flickers made the skull appear as though it were living. The Doctor grinned mischievously as he grabbed a bundle of branches covered in a black fluid and lit them beneath the back entrance of the cave. "Oh yes that should smoke nicely, and now we just need something to draw their attention to it...I do wish I had a megaphone...I suppose a shout will have to do, Jett you may want to cover your ears,"

The Doctor took a deep lung full of air and bellowed out in a deep voice,

"HEAR ME PEOPLE! HEAR ME! I AM THE GREAT AND POWERFUL OZ! YOU WILL OBEY ME!" Jett winced and coughed a little as the smoke choked him up some and his ears rang from the shouting. "YOU WILL COME TO THE CAVE...THE CAVE OF...UM...THE CAVE OF SKULLS AND HEAR MY WORDS!"

"Do you think that will really help?"

"It certainly can't make things much worse, oH I think I hear something. Sit as close to the skull as you can, opposite me and look up at it as though it were your master and follow my lead," moments later there was a loud grinding sound and the stone was rolled away from the cave entrance.

"What noise?! AHHHHH! MONSTER!" came a yell.

"SILENCE YOU SNIVELING FOOL!," the Doctor threw his voice as loud as possible while still looking humble before the skull. "YOU WILL STOP AND HEAR THE WORDS I SPEAK," Tal and his strongest men all stopped and fell to their knees and the Doctor lowered his projected voice saying, "I am the great and powerful Oz. You will release my servants, or I shall bring down wrath from the heavens and destroy you! If you do as I say, I shall remain and you may take the sacred burning brands from my mouth, as a gift for your obedience."

Tal's tribe were falling over themselves with fear, they had never seen anything like it before, which left Jett almost pitying the poor fools, until he remembered that they had been planning on killing and eating both him and the Doctor.

"What say you Tal? Will you obey the great and Powerful Oz, or will you bring ruin and destruction down on you and your tribe?" Jett's eyes burned from the black smoke billowing around the skull.

"You GO! You go NOW! Oz say you GO!" Tal cried out barely raising his head from the cave floor.

The Doctor stood helping Jett up, they walked away from the huddled mass of groveling caveman flesh. "Easy now," the Doctor whispered. They had barely gotten a few hundred yards away before the cavemen started to get restless, not receiving any new instructions from their new god.

"Ready Jett?" Jett nodded and the Doctor grinned, "Always gotta love the running. Right! Let's go!" they took off running as fast and hard as they could, Jett leading the way back to the TARDIS as best as he could remember. It wasn't long before a few of the braver souls from the tribe had snatched up burning branches and here howling with glee as they took off after the pair.

"So much for blending in eh Doctor?" Jett asked with a little laugh as he skidded to a halt outside the TARDIS

"Yes, well, I am a professional time traveler, I usually can get away with these kinds of things," the Doctor pulled out his key and unlocked the door. "Come along Jett, it's time we were off...I mean now, get in now, right now!" the Doctor dragging Jett inside and slammed the door shut, just in time to hear rocks, spears and other weapons clattering against the door. "Door switch!" Jett ran to the console and threw the door lock switch closing off the TARDIS from the rest of the world. "Well, that was interesting..."

"Don't tell me you're going to try again are you?" Jett asked looking wary.

"Of course I am. It was just a simple miss calculation that's all. I'm certain I can recalculate and still get us to Paris 1894...unless you'd rather go back home..." the Doctor almost looked crestfallen as he said it.

"I'll tell you what Doctor. I reek of smoke and filth. I am going to go get a shower and some fresh clothes, you go do your calculations and then maybe you could join me..." Jett shot him a wink and took off down the corridor, the Doctor grinned to himself looking like a kid in the candy store as he worked the console.


End file.
